I don't want to live in alaska.

I stopped being able to focus on doing my work awhile go. At first I thought it was the interest in this new show I began watching on netflix but then I started not being able to concentrate on that the same way. I'm thinking caffeine without eating, plus night fall, plus dim lights and the lack of a proper room one are facilitating a bit of anxiety/depression.

I could of used my time this weekend a little more wisely lol. Maybe I'll feel better after I eat something more substantial? Hopefully my mother doesn't come home with fast food again. She's been doing that a lot lately. I also got some water to perhaps chase away the caffeine... and as it turns out I am thirsty!

First Week Of Classes!

First week of school went relatively well and is continuing to be so far (knock on wood). Although I wanted very much to make a lot of new friends I realize that I have actually very little time to socialize. I don't resent the amount of school work / studying I have to do though (so far) and the subject matter in my classes is pretty enjoyable. Hopefully an honest effort can be made to stay on top of things and that the trend will continue when I have to take more math/science classes!

Woes of the Day

I need to be happy. I need to be excited.. and I need to not be sick anymore!

I also need to restock a few essentials; lip balm, deodorant etc.

I really need to save money right now but I've found some loose bills in a bag of mine... It's important to save right now but, like Minnie said, I shouldn't always just deprive myself. What is money but paper anyway? I think it'll be ok to get a few small things for myselff... perk up my spirits a bit and maybe be more excited for the semester.
I'll still try to see how much I can get other people to pay for though :p

Orientated.

Went to freshman orientation yesterday. Everything went ok considering I was still sick as a dog and couldn't speak (lost my voice). It really sucked not being to talk more and with more people. The kids I ended up touring with (both current and new students like myself), were nice though and were very willing to stay in contact. One of the girls I got to talk to is going to be in my english class on Monday.
I also got to find out when a few events are and that there will be big club fair which I'm pretty excited about since I wasn't sure if there was one during the spring semester. Hopefully I can find someone to go with although I don't mind walking around by myself either.
Being 'in college' is surreal.. like it hasn't really hit me yet. I'm sure things will change and surprises will be had but I still feel like things will be ____________________________.

I want a BC banner for my room and maybe a hoodie but that stuff is expensive lol.

Concrete Catwalk vs. Spring 2012

I got concrete catwalk in the mail today! It really is a very bluish grey but I don't think it's bad at all. After I put it on however I felt a little out of fashion.. I mean I wanted this grey for a long time, and it's still pretty wintry out, but I think I'm more in the mood for spring than I realized. It's just such a dark polish.
The product is nice though and it went on pretty smooth despite my less than adequate nail painting skills lol.

I'll definitely look out for more colors by China Glaze!

P.s. still sick >.<

Haircuts and Illness

I got my haircut today finally! It's not really what I expected. A little girlier than what I wanted but it doesn't look bad or anything. Just, not my usual style. I'll rock it though. I definitely want to try it with different clothes because it doesn't go well with the bunzy, baggy, t-shirt, ripped jeans look. (not that I plan to wear that to school).

The woman used a lot of product and blow drying (for me anyway) and hopefully I don't have to do much of that for it to look decent. We'll see after I take a shower 2moro morning.!

Also.. I'm sick! T_T Sigh, I really hope I recover before school starts.

Financials...

Just paid my tuition for the Spring 2012 semester. Apparently BC doesn't accept VISA so I had to do an 'electronic funds transfer'. Because of my account type I can only pay out up to a certain amount at one time so I was worried there would be problems paying the amount due for tuition. I called the bank for help and stuff but I still hope nothing goes wrong.

Also I called the financial aid office about my FAFSA verification. It was a mistake putting my stepdad under my mom's 'household' because now they want his financial information. Yikes. (He has more money than my mom). However I called them again and told them that he's not actually my stepdad.. as in my mom isn't legally married to him, and they said that I have to redo my Dependent Verification worksheet :(. I don't know when I'm supposed to submit this by.. I should probably call again and find out. I wonder if just handing it in after orientation will be ok. :(

So after way too much deliberation time I ordered China Glaze' Concrete Catwalk and Revlon Colorburst Lip Gloss in Rosepearl from ebay. It added up to around 11 bucks. My friend suggested that she liked Essie Powerclutch better than the China Glaze but, as a cheapo, I took the one that was 2 dollars less.
I don't want to spend more money but I think I will get the Seche Vite top coat + base coat set from CVS. It's 8.99 for the two of them (without tax >.< ) and I have never seen this deal anywhere else. Even on ebay I only found them separate for around the same price as individuals :( . While I'm there I think I will also pick up an NYC color liquid eyeliner (I need a liquid eyeliner) because their cheap but they seem to work alright for the price (another friend of mine uses them) and also a NYC color blushable creme stick. Those got pretty good reviews and I would definitely not mind trying them for the price (plus I needed a blush of my own). Using my mom's cvs 'extra bucks' I could probably get both without really spending any money.
After this and after maybe getting a milani blush I might be complete in a big part of the makeup area. I'll probably still be experimenting with lip colors however and then will be tackling eyeshadows.
I think I need a makeup bag also. Might use a pencil case my friend made me!

To be in season..

So I really like painted nails now, you know, in my own way. I'm currently after a dark grey but spring is coming so I'm wondering if I should just get a color that's more in season. I'll probably end up just getting both.

I mean there's still about two months of cold left even though this is the 'spring semester'. I don't want to spend much money on nail polish either but I have to remember that I don't have to buy both now.

Some colors I'm liking for spring so far are essie's 'Navigate Her', zoya's 'Bevin' and I'm trying to look at some neutrals, blues, and glittery stuff.

Catching Up

So a lot of blog worthy things have happened since my last post but I've failed to blog about them lol.
Around two weeks from now I will be starting classes and attending freshman orientation at BC (CUNY Brooklyn College). I'll be commuting there this semester (:P).. which is a bit of a battle lost but like most things, and hopefully for all the things that follow, I'll strive to make the best of it and be open to a good turn of events.
The commute is on the longer side but I'll look to it with an adventurous spirit. My brother got me a great new timbuk2 school bag. If you haven't heard of them they are notable brand that specializes in bags for commuters and students. They are a little pricey compared to, say, something you probably used in high school, but they are supposed to be quality, utility, and very durable with a hint of the creative/artistic. Mine is pretty cool looking as it was customized. It's the classic, medium size, messenger bag, model.
Besides that, I also got a, Takeya brand, glass water bottle. Again, a little more than some people would spend on a water bottle but I thought it would be a good investment because it's BPA free, environmentally friendly, chic looking, and doesn't effect the taste of the water (as plastic and stainless steal bottles do) which I'm pretty picky about. Plus, I really did need something to take with me to school. One downside, though, is that it's a little bit heavy.

Alright, back to events.!
On the 10th I went to my registration appointment at BC. I got photo student ID card as well as my schedule for classes, and bill for the semester. The damage wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.. actually tuition (after financial aid) cost about as much as I thought it would but I was still relieved to see the amount on paper.
It was a little over 1,000 dollars which is still nothing to scoff at but I think I've received Christmas presents that added up to more or the same as that.

I was a tad disappointed that there wasn't much socializing at the registration day. When waiting in the library for things to start, the other students didn't talk to each other. I thought about saying something but didn't and at the time I wasn't completely sure that they were all incoming freshman until later on.
At the end, I did manage to say 'Hi' and introduce myself to one girl when we were sent to another building to complete our registration. Her name was Carlina and she seemed really friendly and nice. I definitely regret not initiating contact with her sooner as well as not taking any contact information from her before I left.!

Sigh, time is going slow/fast motion right now. I'll be starting at BC in about two weeks but right now I just feel static, waiting. I'm going to pay my tuition after I call the financial aid office about the status of my FAFSA verification. I might actually qualify for a Pell grant (really hope so).
On the other hand I really hope nothing goes wrong and that they don't end up taking away any of my aid or something. I'm also going to inquire about the work study program. I don't plan on keeping my job at Pier 1 (much to my mother's dissatisfaction) but I'd like to work on campus, to earn money, but to also be more involved in the school and have more reasons to spend time there.
Really need to spring clean my room!

Touring BC! It's Gonna Happen..

OMG! So I actually did get a tour of Brooklyn College for tomorrow! We won't be walking around awkward and aimlessly! I had to send an email since a certain person at the offices of BC wasn't picking up the phone but they got back to me promptly (a real person) and I'm so glad I did. We have to meet on the second floor of the big, glass, West Quad Building at the Welcome Center. Tell them we were sent by 'shannon'. I'm so glad! I hope all goes well and I really hope my dad shows up on time!!!! It's at 10am. Wish me luck.

We are also going to visit my sister Julie and family later so maybe that'll take my parent's mind's off things if something unpleasant happens.

Accessoriesss

So I've been thinking a lot about my clothes again, wardrobe planning and such, and I realize I really do need more/new accessories. They really did help me sort of shape my style and outfits. Especially since I'm partial to solid color things and basics because I can't afford the more unique, quality, expressive tops( accessories do a lot).

I like some of the stuff on jewelmint! They're definitely not the most expensive items but I still don't think I could buy something every month or as much as I'd like to. Quality in fashion jewelry is an issue though if you don't have mad bread (but I feel like jewelmint does provide that). Some people don't care, but I can't really stand noticeable cheap shit (accessories) from like forever 21 or some such.

Hopefully I can get some nice accessories before school starts.

Lip Balm Lip Balm

So I'm pretty sure I've mentioned in the past buying Nivea Kiss Of Moisture Essential Lip Care. It was a suggestion by 'real simple' for lips in winter. It's not bad, really soft, so a lot comes off at once. It is moisturizing but on the other hand if you're not used to feeling like there's 'something on your lips' then this might take some getting used to. It feels something akin to vaseline, it might even be softer.
I was the type who didn't like feeling stuff on my lips but I was desperate to get rid of / treat my chappyness.

The real significance of this product however was that it gave me a new appreciation for my Burt's Bees lip balm. I went back to Burt's Bees after using Nivea for awhile, applying it just like I normally used to, and automatically felt how little of the product I was using. Basically, I realized I wasn't getting the full effect of Burt's Bees because I hadn't been putting on enough. Using the right amount it definitely lasts a pretty long time (it did for me, overnight!) and after awhile I did see less peeling of my lips! (without even exfoliating)

(You may have to re-apply after eating and drinking but I don't think that's a big deal.)

(Part of the reason that I think my lip balm doesn't have staying power is that when I put it on I start constantly rubbing my lips together, and sometimes licking them and such.)

So yeah, I'll definitely be buying more Burt's Bees balm when I get a chance. I'm really interested in trying more of the different types/flavors. As for Nivea Kiss Of Moisture well.. I would definitely get it as a supplement in winter (not in the summer because it would melt I think). But I'm still open to trying something else.. Thinking about trying 'Baby Lips' from Maybelline and going back to the past for some classic lip smackers :3

Like I had said in a previous post I got into Brooklyn College and City College (and also CSI, College Of Staten Island). I'm waiting on some registration packets with necessary enrollment forms and such. I'm still waiting on my SUNY notices of admission. Hopefully I hear something from them very soon!

Flex This

My work is getting very unreliable. I keep getting flex shifts in which I have to wait around all day to see if I have to go in at all. Not to mention I went from working 30 hours to 1 - 2 days a week. In the beginning less hours was a nice respite since I didn't like my managers but now I really need the money and these complete flex shifts are an inconvenience because I need to see people and go places (i.e. visit colleges and meet up with certain people). I would find another job but I would only be around for less than a month and a half. *Sigh so annoying.

Plus my mom wont shut up about it! You're not helping woman.. Why are you complaining about MY job? You don't even drive me there. I swear, she just likes to complain. I mean.. what does she think she's doing for me by carrying on the way she does about it? Nothing. Not that she ever thinks of what she's doing to me. >.>

Brooklyn College: The Final Battle

So I've gotten into Brooklyn College and City College, two of my top choices if you remember from some of my posts before. Go figure, things aren't going as well as I'd hoped or fantasized however, even though these schools are close and can't get much cheaper. Thanks for making my pre-college experience, distressing, traumatizing, and sad mother.

My dad is being as supportive as he can be though and we (including my mom and stepdad) are going to visit the Brooklyn College area this Friday. It seems like progress but I feel like it'll be really awkward. There are no official tours or freshman seminars that day so we'll just be putting around. With my dad it's fine but my mom and stepdad are not so easy going or flexible. They just have the biggest aversion to 'winging it' (so freaking up tight sometimes).

Hopefully something unexpected in a good way happens! I'm really hoping there would be.. I'm preparing myself for if I really have to stay here and commute but my dad seems eager to pull through for me and I really appreciate that. I feel a bit defeated but I don't want to give up.

There's just so much to do and so little time to do it. And I can't even do the necessary crap I have to until some major decisions are made.. but seriously I dont have time to wait around for those!. Sigh.. I'd like to fast forward a month.

Passing The Day With Makeup

Spent the better part of this day playing with some of my moms cheap makeup brushes, eye shadow, mascara and my milani eye liner. I'm not going to write anything substantial about them yet though. So far, they are really soft with very good pigmentation. The tip quickly becomes pretty fat however, and it's not ideal for making fine lines.

I learned a lot about mascara today, about building it and it's behavior etc.! I think I would definitely benefit from a good eyelash curler. Also, my mom's eye shadows suck.. and so do her brushes.. really badly.. or maybe I just need some sort of primer.. But I think I prefer cream shadows. I just felt like you could see all the little eye shadow particles.. not smooth at all.

In addition, I think I'm also getting bettter at applying the right amount of the maybelline 24 hour lip color; not letting so much come out at once. I'd still like to try a different color but I've figure out how to make it look more appropriate for my face.

Apps In.. Crisis?

I've pretty much finished all my SUNY applications. I almost had a meltdown just before because I thought that one of the schools needed more letters of recommendations than I had. Fortunately, I looked some more and found that that was just for graduate programs. Even though I've done all I can do and can pretty much say my application process is finished I still feel very nervous.. in part because I submitted everything kind of last minute.. Even though the application deadline is today, December 1st, feels like some of the schools had already been sending out notices of admission. T_T

I wonder if I made a strong enough case justifying my sub par high school performance..It makes me nervous because I don't think I did. The bright side might be that I won't be too sad if I don't get accepted anywhere good (anywhere that I actually want to be).

Milani :3

Today I got the two Milani Liquif'eye eye liner pencils I ordered on black friday. At first I was a little anxious about spending money on them but looking at the receipt I'm pretty glad. For 7.99 I got two classic, quality, eye liners that would normally cost me over 20 dollars including the shipping. Very satisfying buy.

I haven't tried them yet but I can't wait to. I'll definitely report back when I do! :3

P.S. They're paraben free! How great is that?

Presents?

It's the end of November now and we're moving on to the holly jolly holiday season. My stepdad is a bit on top of me about telling him what I want for Christmas so he has time to get it while it's on sale or find it for cheaper. Sigh, I really don't know what I want for christmas yet.